


The Lady in the Lab

by Daughter_of_the_TARDIS



Category: Bones (TV), Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: BAMF River Song, Bones is patient, Drama, F/M, Idiots in Love, Pre-Relationship, So patient, The Doctor is kind of an idiot, Time Lords, Time Travel, but we love him anyway, slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-03
Updated: 2017-10-03
Packaged: 2019-01-08 16:43:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12258165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daughter_of_the_TARDIS/pseuds/Daughter_of_the_TARDIS





	1. Chapter 1

Agent Seeley Booth had just entered the Jeffersonian to visit his partner when someone tapped him on the shoulder. 

“Excuse me.” An English accented voice said. Booth turned to see a rather tall man with floppy brown hair. Looking over him, he wasn't really impressed with what he saw. He had a big chin to go with the hair, and wore a tweed jacket with suspenders and a bow tie. 

“Yeah, what's up, pal?” Booth asked pleasantly. 

The man smiled at him, clapping his hands together. “Do you know where Tes is?”

“Who?”

“Ah, yes.” The man said apologetically. “Dr. Brennan.”

“Yeah, she's my partner.” Booth looked at him in suspicion. “I’m sorry, but who are you?” He wasn't about to trust anyone around his Bones, especially not handsome foreign ones.

The man smiled. “I’m…. an old friend of hers.” But then his eyes narrowed. “Hang on, did you say you were her partner? Because -” he was cut off by Booth.

“Riiight.” Booth said, grabbing the man by the shoulder, and pulling out his handcuffs. “Yeah, except here’s the thing - I don’t buy that for a second. Bones doesn't have friends.”

“I’m sorry, Bones?” The man spluttered. “No, I’m looking for Tes - for Temperence! She’s the Head of the Anthropology Department!” 

“Yeah, except you just tried to lie to me to get at my partner.” Booth said. “And that ain’t gonna work. ‘Cause Bones doesn’t exactly get along with people - like at all.”

Booth moved to take the Brit to his car, when the man went rigid. 

“Angela! Angela Montenegro!” he called, looking ahead of him. “Angela!”

The artist in question paused in her conversation with the resident bug-and-slime guy and turned to look at them before walking over. “What’s going on, Booth?” she asked, looking the man over. “Who is this?”

The Brit laughed, shaking his head fondly. “Ah, you never change, Angela.”

“I’m sorry?” Angela asked, looking shocked. “Have we met before?”

He smiled at her. “The last time we met,” he admitted, “I wore a ridiculous looking scarf, and offered you Jelly Babies.” he said. “Been a long time since then for me, but it can’t have been too long for you, eh? As lovely as ever.”

Angela’s eyes lit up in recognition as she gave a hysterical laugh in surprise. “Doc?”

The man nodded, looking slightly worried when Angela burst into tears.

“Angela, do you know this guy?” Booth asked. 

She nodded, continuing to cry as she pulled the man into a hug. He laughed awkwardly, attempting to hug her back but was stopped by the handcuffs. Angela rolled her eyes, holding out her hand for the keys to the cuffs even as she kept her arms around him, maneuvering awkwardly to wipe the tears from her eyes. “We thought you were dead.” She murmured, just loud enough for him to hear.

“Angie?” Hodgins asked, walking over. “Who is this?”

Angela let go of the man, but held onto his hand. “This is a very old friend of mine.” she said excitedly, before her eyes went wide. 

“Does she know you’re here?” She asked the man, who shook his head. 

Angela laughed, pulling on his arm. “Well come on then, sweetie.” she said, raising an eyebrow at the man. “Let’s go make our girl’s universe-” the stress on the word, followed by the man’s laughter made both Hodgins and Booth curious. “a little bit brighter.”

And so, the two men followed behind in shock and surprise - as well as a little bit of anticipation - as Angela half-dragged, half-led the man into the Jeffersonian.

Booth rolled his eyes as he heard the man question Angela about him. “Who is that man - the one that says he's Tes’s partner? She hasn't - I mean, she didn't -” he made a face, much to Angela's amusement. “Did she?”

But Angela shook her head. “No, sweetie. They work together, that's all.” Then she smirked. “Although if I had any say in things, they would be by now.” She mused.

Hodgins laughed as the Brit yelped in indignation, looking irritated. He had no idea who this guy was, but he did know one thing - he was going to make life very interesting.

888

Dr. Temperence Brennan was up on the forensic platform examining a set of remains when Angela came up on the platform. 

“Sweetie.” she said, crossing her arms over her chest and tapping her foot against the concrete floor of the forensic platform.

Dr. Brennan didn’t even look up. “What is it, Angela?” she asked. There was something about this bone that she couldn't figure out, and it would take her just another minute or so to figure it out.

“I’ve got a surprise for you.” she said.

“Can it wait?” Brennan asked, still focused in on the remains.

Suddenly, her concentration was shattered as an unfamiliar voice answered. “Sorry, Tes, but it can’t.” 

Bones nearly dropped the mandible that she was holding at the sound of that voice. She didn't know the voice, but she did know the nickname. There was only one person that she had ever known that had ever called her that, and the last time she had heard it it had been said in a deep baritone that was hidden behind tombstone teeth and a floppy hat. She set the bone down slowly as Mr. Vincent Nigel-Murray looked on in confusion.

“Theta.” she whispered, then said it once again, slightly louder, as she moved around the examination table, her eyes filling up with tears.

Everyone else stopped what they were doing as alarms went off when the man in the bow tie and tweed rushed onto the forensic platform as Dr. Temperence Brennan rushed at him.

“Theta!” she yelled, jumping into his arms, clutching at him like she was dying. He spun her around, laughing, clutching at her just as tightly. Everyone in the lab looked at the usually emotionless anthropologist in surprise.

“Tes…” he muttered, collapsing on the floor with the crying Dr. Brennan still in his arms. 

“I thought I’ve never see you again…” Dr. Brennan was crying as she pulled away, looking him in the eyes. “After the last time….. back home….. Arcadia….”

The Doctor stroked her hair soothingly. “I know, Tes… it’s alright, I’m here….. I’m here….”


	2. Chapter 2

After about five minutes of the duo sitting on the floor of the forensic platform, just holding onto each other, Temperance felt someone touch her shoulder. She lifted her head to see Angela smiling at her, and she managed to smile back, eyes still shining with tears. 

“Come on, Brennan.” Her best friend - and the one human on the entire continent who knew the truth about her - said gently. “Let's go talk in your office.”

Temperance nodded as she got to her feet, pulling the strange man along with her. She swiped her card at the bottom of the forensic platform, silencing the alarms that had been going off for the last seven minutes or so. Others would have done it, but they were too busy staring at Doctor Brennan’s strange emotional reaction.

Before they could even make it halfway to her office, though, Booth stopped them, grabbing a hold of her arm. The Doctor turned when he was jerked to a stop, and raised an eyebrow at the sight of him holding onto her. Surprisingly, he didn't say anything.

“Whoa, Bones!” he protested. “Aren’t you going to explain?”

“Explain what, Booth?” she asked, confused as to why her partner had stopped her from proceeding to her office. She clutched the Doctor’s arm in an ironclad grip, as if she was afraid that he was going to slip through her fingers.

“Who this guy is, Bones. That's what I need to know.” Booth asked, as if it was an obvious question. For most of them, it was an obvious question, but Temperance Brennan was always very secretive.

“No, you don't, Booth.” Brennan answered.

She could hear Theta next to her, whispering in Angela’s ear: “Well, her people skills still haven’t gotten any better.”

Then there was Angela’s snort of laughter as she elbowed Theta in the ribs, along with his gasp of pain, before returning her attention to Booth.

“I don’t see how that is any of your concern, Booth.” Dr. Brennan responded, pushing past her FBI partner. The Doctor smirked at the agent, before turning around to look at Brennan again.

As she walked away, Booth could hear her and Angela talking with her mysterious ‘Theta’:

“Ok Doc, tell me everything.” Angela said, slipping her arm through his. “Did you meet anyone? Did you get any?”

“Where did you visit? Which species of flora and fauna did you come across, Theta?”

8888

As soon as the door to Dr. Brennan's office was closed, The Doctor was attacking her in a hug again, and she laughed as he lifted her off of her feet. 

“Theta Lungbarrow, put me down!” she shrieked, and he dropped her automatically before looking around her office. She smirked - that had always worked when they were children, and it still worked now that they were both into their thousands. Some things never changed.

“Right. So,” he said, pausing, before spinning with a flourish. “What do you think?” The ladies took in his new look - ancient green eyes, floppy brown hair, and an outfit that would not have been out of place on some of her old anthropology professors.

Angela smirked, nodding appreciatively, while Tes outright laughed. “You look ridiculous.” she told him.

When she took the time to think about it, she was glad that the rest of her colleagues - and Booth - didn’t see her then. She was a different person around Theta than she was with anyone else. Angela had traveled with them enough that she knew the difference, and had become very good friends with both the Doctor and Tes in the process.

“Which number are you on now?” She asked quietly, dreading the answer. The last time that she had seen him, he had been on number Four…..

“Eleven.” he answered quietly, and Angela gasped, but Tes just raised an eyebrow. “Okay.” he huffed, before admitting, “Thirteenth.”

“So we’re finally even then.” she stated, and he nodded solemnly. “And Gallifrey?” she said, almost afraid to ask. 

“Gone.” Theta said sadly, his shoulders drooping as Angela pulled him down to sit in between the two ladies on Dr. Brennan's couch. She wrapped him in a hug as Tes tried to process that. Gallifrey - while not one of her favourite places - had still been her home. Now it was gone, and she could never go back.

The Doctor wrapped her up in a hug, and that was when she realized she was crying. 

They just sat like that for another thirty minutes or so, before managing to compose themselves even a little. 

“So.” Tes said, and if her voice was thicker than normal, they all ignored it. “What have you been doing since then?”

That cheered him up slightly, and sent him into a story involving a version of him with big ears and a leather jacket, a girl named Rose, and the Nestene Consciousness in London……

several hours later….. 

“Wow.” Angela said, exhausted from just listening to - and occasionally watching re-enactments - of the Doctor's adventures. “Are you sure that’s all?”

“Well…” Theta said, giving a secretive little smile, and Angela and Tes shared a glance. 

“Out with it, time boy.” Angela said, trying not to laugh.

“What?” he asked, looking entirely too pleased with himself.

“Oh, just tell us already.” Tes said, rolling her eyes. “You are rubbish at keeping secrets.”

“Ha!” Theta said, pointing at me with childish glee. “You said ‘rubbish’!” 

“So?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. “You say it all of the time. In all of your regenerations.”

“Yes, but you’re American this time.” he responded with exaggerated patience. 

“Don’t think that this is going to get you off of the hook, young man.” she warned, smiling happily as he pouted. 

“Fine.” he whined, but then jumped up off of her couch, nearly falling over in the process “But I can’t tell you about it.” he said, as he walked backward out of her office, nearly running into the door at the same time. He headed back into the main lab area where Booth was still sitting, waiting.

“And why not?” Angela asked.

“Because you’ll never believe me unless I show you!” he responded.

“Fine.” Dr. Brennan said, too tired to deal with him anymore. “When will you be coming back?” she asked him.

“Uh….. tomorrow…. I think!” He said, and she rolled my eyes before shooing him off.

The anthropologist felt Booth come up behind me, and smirked slightly. “I'm not telling you who he is, Booth.”

He huffed. “Why not?” 

“Because,” she said simply, “You wouldn't believe me if I told you.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A/N - So I forgot to mention this before, but this story takes place after episode 5x16 “The Parts in the Sum of the Whole”, as far as the Bones timeline is concerned. As for Doctor Who, it takes place slightly before TATM. 
> 
> Disclaimer: I still do not own either Doctor Who or Bones…….. Sadly

.

Booth was beginning to get irritated on Bones’ behalf.

It had been about a month since Bones’s “friend” came to visit, promising to come back again the next day.

However, he had yet to return. Booth was surprised that Bones hadn’t gotten mad at him yet - after all, she got mad at him all the time for much less serious offenses. She was mad whenever he was late to pick her up for a case, when he interrupted her work, when he made her stop working in order to eat...

But when he asked her about it, all that she do was smile at him and say that “Theta” always was terrible at driving.

The part that irritated him the most about the entire thing was that Bones still refused to tell him who the hell this ‘Theta’ guy was. He would only let Bones call him that, too. He told everyone else to call him ‘the Doctor’, - even Angela, although she called him ‘Doc'. Angela refused to tell Booth anything, too - whenever he asked, she’d just say that it wasn’t her secret to tell. Eventually, she told Bones that he was snooping, and he got an earful.

There were things about Doctor Temperance Brennan that had never made any sense to him, though. Back when both she and Hodgins had been abducted by the Grave Digger, Angela had made a few calls. Within a few hours, two different teams of Brits were at the Jeffersonian, willing to do anything to help. He still didn't know how Angela knew the Brigadier General of UNIT, or the Director of whatever the hell Torchwood was, but both had greeted her as an old friend. However she knew them, it got both Bones and Hodgins found, and so he didn't ask any questions at the time.

Now that this ‘Doctor Theta’ had shown up in their lives, he was starting to wonder if he should have asked more questions back when he had the chance.

8888

The Doctor had finally managed to land the TARDIS about half a kilometer away from the Jeffersonian Institute, after being….. distracted, from what he had been trying to do.   
“Speaking of distractions…” he murmured, feeling a brush on the telepathic bond between his wife and himself, mere moments before her arms wrapped around his waist.

“So what is it that you wanted to show me, Sweetie?” she asked, her voice sending shivers down his spine.

He turned to face her, smirking as he tapped her on the nose fondly. “Spoilers.”

She rolled her eyes at him as he giggled. “You've been dying to use that, haven't you?” she accused, and he nodded, grabbing her hand as he pulled her outside.

River looked around as they stepped outside of the Police Public Call Box, taking in the cars, the environment…… and finally her eyes widened as she saw the Jeffersonian.

“Oh, Sweetie.” she breathed out. He giggled, excited that he had managed to surprise her for once.

“And,” He told her, slipping his hand into hers once more and relishing how well they fit together. “There's someone here I'd like you to meet.”

8888

Booth and Bones were just getting back to the Lab after lunch at the Royal Diner when he heard it. 

“Sweetie, who is it?” A woman’s voice; from across the pond, judging by the accent. “Who are we going to see?”

“Rivah-” another voice, this one male - and very familiar - whined back at her. “If I tell you who we’re going to see, it won’t be a surprise!”

“If you tell me-” Booth stopped in his tracks as he turned the corner, and felt Bones run into him from behind. “-I’ll be sure to thank you for it later on…”

“Booth!” she complained loudly, trying to push him out of the way. He hushed her, before pulling her around the corner so that they wouldn’t be spotted.

He was furious. It was obvious to him that this ‘Doctor’ was cheating on Bones. Didn’t he know how lucky he was to have her, Booth wondered. She was going to be furious when she found out.

“Just… stay put, okay Bones?” Booth said, leaving their hiding spot before she could answer.

“Rivah!” ‘the Doctor’ - because Booth refused to believe that that was his real name - whispered. “Someone might hear you!”

“Actually,” Booth said, coming up behind the pair, “Someone already has.” And with that, he grabbed onto the British dude’s jacket and spun him around, slamming him face-first into the wall.

8888

River Song watched in shock as an American man in a rather nice suit came up to them and slammed her husband into the wall for no reason. She pulled out her gun, and was about to threaten him, when she heard what he was saying to the Doctor.

“How could you?” the man all but growled, pressing his face further into the wall. “She is the best thing that could ever possibly happen to you - how could you even think of cheating on her?”

“Excuse me?” River asked, blinking in surprise. This man was accusing the Doctor of cheating on someone - which automatically meant that he would also be cheating on her. 

“Not now, lady.” the man said to her dismissively, before turning back to her husband. “And you had the nerve to bring your little girlfriend here, of all places….”

She heard a female voice saying, “Booth? What are you -” just as she shot back, “Girlfriend? I’m his wife!”

“Wife?” the female voice said in surprise, and River turned around to look at her. “Oh, Theta! How could you?” 

The new woman was beautiful, and while River normally would have been at least slightly jealous, for some reason she wasn’t this time. Her hand was clasped to her mouth, and there were tears shining in her eyes.

“See, Bones?” the man said, smug yet sad as he let go of the Time Lord. “He’s no good for you, I’ve known it all along. He doesn’t deserve -” 

He cut himself off as “Bones” ran past him, throwing herself on top of the Doctor.

That’s when River decided that enough was enough.

“Right then.” She said, raising an eyebrow at her husband. “Would anyone care to explain what’s going on?

8888

Brennan couldn't believe what she was hearing. Theta, her Theta, was married.

“Wife?” she asked in surprise, and the woman turned to look at her. She was absolutely stunning, with big blonde curls and blue-green eyes, and a gorgeous figure. “Oh Theta, how could you?” 

The rest of the message she sent using the telepathic link that all Time Lords and Ladies had. You got married without me? She added a hint of anger, but she was mainly upset. They had done everything together as children - she had helped him and Susan escape Gallifrey when he was just beginning. But he hadn't even told her.

She heard Booth talking, but didn't listen to a word that he was saying as she launched herself at Theta, wrapping her arms around him in a hug. 

“Right then.” The blonde woman said, and Tes pulled away from the Doctor just enough to see the murderous look she was giving them. “Would anyone care to explain what's going on?”

8888 

Booth couldn't understand why Bones was happy about what was happening.

“What the hell, Bones?” he asked her. “How are you not furious with him? This ‘Doctor' of yours is a cheating bastard, and you're acting like nothing is wrong?”

Brennan pulled away from the guy like he was poisonous, and he backed away from her as well. “What are you talking about, Booth?” she asked him, making a face. 

The Doctor made an equally disgusted one. “You don't really think -”

“Oh, that's disgusting!”

“River, I swear I'm not cheating on you. I would never do that to you.” the Doctor reassured, while Bones continued to stare at Booth in shock. “I promise, dear.”

River just looked at him, unimpressed. “Oh really?” she asked, raising a brow at the man in the bow tie. “Then who is she?”

8888

The Doctor moved forward, grabbing River's hand in his own as he moved closer to Tes. 

“River Song, I'd like you to meet Tes -” Tes glared at him, and he quickly corrected himself, “Sorry, Dr. Temperance Brennan.”

River just rolled her eyes at him as she huffed. “Yes, I know that. But who is she to you?”

That was when Tes smiled at the Doctor, before turning to River. 

“I’m his sister.” She said, pulling River into a hug. “It’s very nice to meet you.”


End file.
